Axehole

A World of Warcraft fan found out earlier this month what happens when you accidentally drop your iPod in an airline toilet. It becomes a “suspicious package.”

Not just any suspicious package, though. A bring-out-the-canines, isolate the plane, interrogate the passengers and look for a terrorist suspicious package.

“It all started when I got out of my seat to go to the bathroom,” according to “Tim” at the WOW forum. “I went to the bathroom, washed my hands, and returned to my seat.”

Soon, he realized that he’d made a problem in the restroom.

“I locked off the front lav,” said one of the stewardesses. “There’s something in the toilet that’s preventing it from flushing. Run some water and see if you can clear it.”

“My face immediately turned red,” said the WoW fan, thinking his restroom break was the cause of the plugged toilet. So he decides to not say anything, forget his embarassment and listen to his iPod.

That’s when he realized what must have happened. So he sheepishly tells one of the stewardesses that he must have accidentally dropped his iPod in the toilet. And that’s when the captain came on the intercom:

“Folks, this is the captain. I don’t want to alarm you, but we’ve found a suspicious device in the front lavatory.”

When the plane landed, things went from bad to worse.

“Folks, this is the captain. We’ve been ordered to make an immediate stop. Buses are coming to evacuate the aircraft.” We were to leave all of our belongings on the aircraft; we would be shuttled by bus to the terminal, where we would receive our carryon items.

The passengers were delayed, then segregated off to be interviewed. Then they took Tim, the WoW fan, to be interrogated.

“They took me to a discreet corner,” explains Tim. “They brought out a tape recorder. I was told to put my hands up on the wall and spread my legs, and I was frisked from head to toe. They removed my wallet, disassembled it completely, and placed each of its contents in its own plastic evidence bag.”

After getting frisked, Tim had to explain the nature of his travels, and explain what World of Warcraft is. Next, they searched Tim’s laptop for porn.

Yeah - that’s probably when they’d lead a number of Axehole readers off to Guantanamo. Fortunately, that wasn’t Tim’s fate.

In the end, Tim got his iPod back, though a little less appealing than before.

“I just got it back from the bomb squad,” said one of the detectives. “It’s an iPod. Do you want it back?”

“It’s been in the toilet!” said Tim.

“Yeah, it’s messy.” Then he walked right up to my ear. “Tim, you’re not in any trouble anymore. Nothing you say now is going to be on record. I want you to answer a question honestly, just for me, not for my agency.”

“OK?” said Tim.

He whispered into my ear. “Did you … did you take a dump, and then drop your iPod in the toilet on accident?”

Moral of the story: Don’t take your iPod in the airline bathroom.

via Tim